Thursday, July 11, 2013

Just kidding, I'm not gonna slaughter a damn sheep.

     I've been wondering if I could live in a different country. My first thought about it is no way, since I am such a fucking baby about living only 2500 miles away from my friends and Mom. How would I function in a culture that's so different from mine that the language is different, when I can't even understand a southern drawl?? I bitch about everything Florida related, down to the street lights (that one is hard to explain, but trust me, they're fucked up). Husband lived in Sicily for a while when his Dad was in the Navy. I've heard wonderful and terrifying stories. How would I handle driving down two lane roads on a cliff with no speed limit and the likely reality of having to wait for 150 sheep to cross the road in the middle of my journey? My journey to the ONE store in town, which doesn't even sell loaves of bread. Because people bake their own bread...duh! And the electricity is iffy. Do people have running toilets or outhouses? I can't remember...I'm pretty sure he said the weather is just like California except people don't have air conditioning there. WTF.....I seems like I'm too American for all that. Ugh. How gross of me to say that! I want to experience as much as possible in this life, and not limit myself to my small American life, but I know that what is most important to me is family (which to me is the same word as "friends") so what to do??

      And then there's Bug. I'm already sad she can't grow up with my California friend's daughter who is the same age, if I leave the country she will be missing out on growing up with Princess L too! I have a few friends that I have known since kindergarten, and I cherish those friendships so much. I know how hard they are to come by. I wish that for Bug too. I know her life can be just as wonderful without those kinds of relationships, but it still makes me a bit sad to think about. Alright, I am WAY ahead of myself now. Anyway, it is a thought in the back of my mind. Where would I go? We love France, and hope to at least take Gage there for graduation.
Nice, France
      Italy sounds interesting to me, or we both like Spain. Husband likes Portugal and Austria too, but I don't know what the fuck he's talking about there. Gage wants to go to Canada. Hm. That could be cool. There is the little matter of which countries would take us, too. Other countries are smart enough to make sure you're an asset before they let you live there. Unlike the US. As we all know.

     Maybe I watch too much Anthony Bourdain.... I have this admittedly unrealistic view on these places, like when I go to Spain I will help herd 100 sheep and then snack on the soft, sheep's milk cheese and freshly baked bread that someone's ancient old wife made for our trip, and pair it with regional wine from a handmade canteen. Then I'd slaughter a lamb two minutes before I cook it in a delicious stew, and spend the rest of the afternoon getting stuffed and drunk in a meadow full of wildflowers, with handsome native people who all wear the same white flowy shirt and black vests, and who speak in their romantic language that I don't understand but consider mounting my husband while they talk because it is THAT sexy.. Maybe afterwards someone would break out a guitar and sing Italian folk music, and I could nap......sigh....
Anthony (My hero) with the sheep in Spain
     In reality, it would probably be me blogging every 40 minutes about how much I miss 7-11 and sliced bread. That is, when my Wi-Fi worked...eek.

     It is a possibility that we could move out of the country, though. We've discussed it before. It is a desire we have both for us and our kids. By that time Gage will be grown, but to have a foreign country be the place he gets to go to visit us would be wonderful for him. I think he'd love that. Of course, if he has kids I'll wanna go live down the street from him, but we'll deal with that when we get there, right?
I dunno. It will take a lot of thought. I'm the hold up in this venture. I know that.

     I wanna be Anthony Bourdain I think. He lives a charmed life. The dude has eaten the best, drank the best, and met the most interesting people in the most interesting of places. He IS the most interesting man in the world.

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